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January 06, 2005
She's right you know
Oh boy. The guy from the graphics department just sent me the proofs from our photo shoot and like a gibbering orangutan high on banana chips, I sent the link to someone at work. Now everyone in the whole freaking department has seen them and yukked it up over the Invisiballs and my ability to look simultaneously annoyed and contorted. Stupid computers and their email forwarding capabilities! I’ve kind of had it in general with intraoffice Instant Messaging and gossip and happy hours and inappropriate getting down etc. Folks, if I can’t be in on it, it needs to stop. Get back to work, there’s content to manage!
I decided today that I am, by default, the bad cop at the office. My boss, who I adore, is a crazy mutherfunker whom I am constantly shushing when he starts referring to past LSD binges, his appreciation for gas-huffing and his love of sticking it to the man. Keep in mind we are firmly entrenched in Corporate America where this kind of behavior is frowned upon. However, due to an overabundance of talent and charm, my boss is worshipped by all. That leaves me, as second in command, to do the dirty work of reminding people to log their sick time, listening to and appropriately documenting ergonomic concerns and injuries, and doling out the annual 3% raises. To put it in terms that the Bean could understand, I am Bert to my boss’ Animal. And who wants to fricking party with Bert? Pigeons, that’s who. Down with Bert!
Tonight for the first time since dinosaurs roamed the earth, I exercised. Last weekend, I used the wet/dry vac to vacuum up the dead spider collection that we have been housing in little piles of cat litter around the basement floor. I then bought a rug for $19.99 from Home Depot and set up my treadmill (purchased optimistically just after I got pregnant ha ha ha) on the new rug. Thus begat Fitness 2005. I always forget when I haven’t worked out for a long time how much I actually enjoy it. Now that I no longer have the time or energy to go to the gym, I am hopeful that my dreary little basement home gym will have me treadmilling my way to fitness in no time.
My favorite part of the workout was having to step off the treadmill at one point to dance to that Nelly and Christina Aguilera duet which, until I listened to it nine times in a row on my ipod, I never realized was so good. Note: it is very difficult to dance on a treadmill, I don't recommend it even in the comfort and safety of your own home. I think I might be the only pushing-forty white woman who is into what my younger and million times cooler husband tells me is “dirty south” music. Yeah! Yeah! What?
The forecast calls for a rare inch or two of snow tomorrow, so I bought the Bean a snowsuit. As soon as there is snow on the ground, we will commence with the frolicking. This cop may be bad, but she has Fridays off. Yeah.
Posted by Max at January 6, 2005 12:39 AM